Lisa's Adventures in Screenwriting, Part 1

We've been talking a lot of production nuts and bolts so far, which I hope some aspiring inexperienced filmmakers may find useful.

Now a little bit about the script, because in my heart of hearts, I consider myself a writer above all else.

I may have deceived you a little bit. My background is not strictly limited to hypnotherapy and teaching math. Because I have not yet figured out how to relax in my free time, I am usually involved in several ongoing pursuits. One of these was the Venice Arts Screenwriting Competition, which I founded and ran between 1999 and 2003. I read, evaluated, and critiqued thousands of scripts over the years. I rounded up judges, hustled prizes, and designed the first competition to offer a fully automated online script submission process - point, click, upload, pay. (That UCLA degree in Math-Computer Science came in real handy.) With the help of my husband Craig, the best techno guru of all time, we even allowed the entrants to log in to the website and check their scores and judges' comments. This is probably standard operating procedure for today's screenwriting competitions - but we were the first to be fully automated. The sound you hear is me patting myself on the back.

In 2002, we partnered with Zeta Entertainment ("Shiloh", "Gun Crazy" etc.) in running the competition, and that year called our joint venture 'Script World'. This was my first direct experience with an actual producer. My initial and lasting impression was that producers are people who spend all their time on the phone. I had no idea what they talked about - just that it involved a lot of shmoozing. I later found out first hand what it is producers talk about. (casting, locations, vehicles, scheduling, permits, insurance ....)

Tip #3 for Producers: You'd better like talking on the phone.

Because of our partnership in administering the competition, Zeta Entertainment generously gave me the title of 'Director of Development'. Look it up in the 2003 Hollywood Creative Directory under "Z" for Zeta. There's my name. And in Hollywood, it's all about getting your name out there, on as many things as you can.

Venicearts.com also offered the first fully automated screenplay query submission service. I built and maintained a database of producers willing to accept email queries. I sent out thousands of queries between 1999 and 2006. I have put spin on every conceivable screenplay concept - the good, the bad, and the ugly. My query submission service was apparently such a good idea that it was copied by two other services. One of them literally lifted copy directly from my web site. The problem is, when too many query submission services start sending out too many queries per day to the same database of producers, their inboxes become diluted. Instead of getting one or two per day (I strictly limited my output to two per day), they were getting ten to twenty queries per day. And at that point they stop being queries and start becoming spam. It ruins the whole system for both the query services and their clients. After 7 years of writing and editing queries every night, I was happy to retire.

What I really wanted to do was write my own screenplays.

My first screenplay was in 1993. My cousin Marla inherited some money and decided to produce a film. She was already involved in working with other producers. What's the first thing you need to make a movie? A screenplay. So she gave her nerdy cousin Lisa a call.

"Lisa, remember how when we were growing up, all you ever did was sit in your room and write stories?" (This could be perceived as either a compliment or insult.)

"Yeah ... "

"I'm going to produce a movie. Can you write a screenplay for me?"

"Sure!"

This was a big leap of faith for Marla - commissioning a writer whose sole experience was writing bad Six Million Dollar Man novellas in her bedroom 15 years earlier. However, she did have down Producer's Tip #4:

Tip #4 for Producers: Never underestimate the value of a free service.

So I went out and bought my first book on screenwriting: Viki King's "How to Write a Movie in 21 Days". I have read tons of screenwriting books since then, and this one remains one of my favorites. I highly recommend it to first-time writers.

I banged out a screenplay for Marla in roughly 21 days. It was about a female karate instructor (a topic I knew absolutely nothing about), because her partner felt this would sell big in international markets. Alas, Marla never made her movie. She married her 3rd husband and spent all her inheritance on a used Mercedes and an extended honeymoon in Europe. She kept the Mercedes longer than the husband. (Marla, if you're reading this, I hope you will think twice about impulsive decisions. Love, Lisa.)

But - one can't view this as wasted time. I learned a lot writing that screenplay. And I found my passion.